I thought

Ya.. I thought
Every things just i thought
I still keep the thought and lie and joke in my heart until someone break it out
I don't know why every times she will understand my feelings without my saying directing
I don't know why she will know my hurts and pain when the time i say i'm fine and okay and evreyone is believing of that except her
I don't know why she will know the way to get back my smile and laugh just in a second when i still moody
I don't know why everytimes she can get back my soul easily
I don't know why she will still understand of me since we are far the distance and seldom to meet her up
I thought no one not really understand of my minds without i say any words
I thought my heart stories just will get a reader
What i thoughts is ended up till she coming in
I can't continue my pretending on her as she really know of that
I can't continue my lies on her as she can see through my actions
I can't continue to control my tears as she is making me feel so touch
I asked her why everytimes she is so on time to pull me up
Why just only her and she is far away from me
She told me cause we are excellent than best friend
Because we almost like a twin.
Like the thinking. The feelings. And almost the things we found, felt, talking, laughing are the same
Is same! Not almost same!
Hmmm.. ya...I guess.. I think so..
You are so special to me than everyone
The friendship is counting in 7 or 8 years and the counter still be function well
That's why you can get back my soul easily
That's why you can make all my true feelings screaming out from the heart
That's why we are sisters
What she told me that "Sometimes . It is really difficult to forget or trying to find something else to do as busy as possible then will forget the unhappiness. Cause in the end, the feelings will coming back when you alone and free"
Yes.. i knew.. but i have no other way to solve it
I always just have one way to do so
That's searching the way to avoid. To escape. To evade
And till i hate myself to unfollow my heart
That's why everyone ask me to learn how to protect myself
Sometimes.. Not i don't want to.. just my mind tells me that i can't
So.. In the end, i bring myself into troubles without solving the problems on others yet and fail to save myself